I honestly feel like a little kid throwing a tantrum- but come on, wouldn’t that just makes things so easier?
Because, as life would have it, there are so many things staring me in the face right now that need answers. Pretty big things, with answers that can determine a pretty big chunk of my life. Welcome to your 20’s…right?
Of course its in my nature to explore every single possible answer to these questions too. And then sit and think about them. And think about them. And think about them. I am a full time over-analyzer, and its actually pretty exhausting.
I could do this, or I could do that – but what is the right could do? What is the should do? And I rack my brain to the point of unbearable. Some days, I just want the flashing sign that gives me that answer. And some days, I expect to get it.
But, as we all know, God doesn’t do the flashing signs -he doesn’t blatantly give you the arrows that point you in the “right” direction. Because, while we sit here trying to rack our brains, we’re living the arrows that are leading us home.
And I don’t have the answer for this one (not that I actually have the answer for anything). But this one, this one really gets me.
What I do know, is this. God has a plan for me. And he’s giving me the people, the challenges, the experiences, and the knowledge to get to that plan – It’s up to me to trust it. And as I sit here and type this, its so hard to feel that trust. Its something I’ve always struggled with as a Christian. But quite frankly, its all we’ve really got that is sure in this life.
“Experiencing the abundant life God intends for us does not mean that our lives will be problem free… As Christians, our fulfillment in this life depends not on our skills to avoid life’s problems but on our ability to apply God’s specific solutions to those problems.”
So its pretty obvious I need to work on my trust with God. My trust that he won’t lead me to a place I don’t want to end up. And I think with trust comes patience. In the meantime, instead of killing my brain trying to figure out what he’s doing up there, I’m going to embrace the things he’s given me. (easier to say then actually do however.) Those same things, that will build me into the person I’m meant to become. Trying to see the light & truth in all of this.
But it ain’t easy. I’ll admit that.
Prayers for a peaceful blanket to a restless mind this week please.
And continued prayers for my Purple Raider family. Thinking of you all often.
And this is perfect, what a great little song that I NEEDED to discover the other day. (Megan & Nate – Thanks for this video share!)